I woke up in a very bad mood. It’s Saturday, which doesn’t help matters any, there was a nasty storm last night that kept me up well beyond my comfort zone, my daughter is being a class A hell raiser. This list can go on and on. I feel as though fire is raging through my body just waiting for the right moment to explode and incinerate anyone who dares cross me today.
I wish with every thing I have to be able to curl up in front of a good movie with a huge pile of chocolate, an unending supply of hot coffee, a gallon of ice cream and all out side communications disconnected. However, I have work to do, a daughter to care for, an RV to renovate and this list can go on and on. I can’t give in to this black cloud today. Damnit.
It’s a deary over cast morning, which is making my black cloud even worse. I can’t exile my little one to the outside in this weather. She’s going to have to be inside all day in a tiny little space practically right on top of her grumpy mom. I’ll try my best not to be short with her, but I won’t tolerate her misbehaving today.
The damn air conditioning is on! It’s barely 60 outside and the air is on. I’m forced to huddle up under a blanket in a bath robe and sweats and I’m still freezing. My daughter’s hands are like ice. And the only thing I can do is deal with it or camp out in the RV. And since it is that nasty thing called a weekend, I’ll most likely be out in the RV as much as possible. Which means my daughter is going to have that much less room. My moods getting worse by the word here.
So why am I venting right now? Mainly because if I don’t get it out I’m going to snap and that doesn’t make for happy times. Secondly, because the scene I plan to work on today isn’t an angry or violent one, which means my mind needs to be in a better place. I can’t write a happy joyful scene when all I can think about is what I can throw against the wall and not be sorry I broke latter.
Why here on my blog? Hell if I know. Maybe to show that I’m a real person with real emotions. Nah, y’all know that without my venting don’t you? It’s more likely I’m venting here because that’s the only thing my inky mind can think of right now. And it’s better to get it out instead of taking a hammer to the air conditioning unit or throwing my coffee cup across the room into a window because it’s cold already.
I’m feeling better already. I’m still in a grumpy mood. I still want to cause damage to inanimate objects. I still want to scream at the top of my lungs. But I can handle it.